tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940221697322159192024-02-19T04:33:56.572+00:00Crabbed Into SunlightDr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-32785627668090453352013-01-02T19:20:00.000+00:002013-02-19T19:26:31.115+00:00Some records I enjoyed in 2012<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">My spare time is becoming increasingly rare. My record playing time is getting eaten up by work, education and gigs. I haven't even had time to post a single entry on this blog. As such, my list for this year is somewhat unfair - some of these albums have been played more than others and had more chance to make an impact. Often then have kept me sane while I work, others have only had a few spins on the turntable. Live performances have also changed a few judgements. Some albums I bought this year are still sealed in cellophane. Then there's all the ones I never got round to buying! If I had the time to listen to each record released during the year for the same length of time, my judgement would be a lot less skewed, I'm sure. However I would probably have died of malnutrition. Anyway, here's my rough end of year list for 2012.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">1. Swans - The Seer</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2. Memory Drawings - Music For Another Loss</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3. Clark - Iradelphic</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4. JK Flesh - Posthuman</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">5. Godspeed You! Black Emperor - Don't Bend Ascend</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">6. A Forest of Stars - A Shadowplay For Yesterdays</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">7. Necro Deathmort - The Colonial Script</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">8. Conan - Monnos</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">9. Wodensthrone - Curse</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">10. Fieldhead - A Correction</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">11. Unsane - Wreck</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">12. A-Sun Amissa - Desperate In Her Heavy Sleep</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">13. Razmataz Lorry Excitement - If It Takes Me All Night Long</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">14. Hesper Payne / Sabazius - Under The Alum Shale</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">15. White Hills - Frying On This Rock</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">16. Trippy Wicked & The Cosmic Children of the Knight - Going Home</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">17. Chelsea Wolfe - Unknown Rooms</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">18. Ghosting Season - The Very Last of The Saints</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">19. Earth - Angels of Darkness, Demons of Light II</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">20. Stinking Lizaveta - 7th Direction</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">21. Nope - Revision</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">22. Mugstar - Axis</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">23. Latitudes - Individuation</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">24. Northerner - I Am On Your Side</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">25. Pye Corner Audio - Sleep Games</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">26. The Cosmic Dead - The Cosmic Dead</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">27. Glissando - The World Without Us</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">28. Neurosis - Honor Found In Decay</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">29. Pallbearer - Sorrow and Extinction</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">30. Tree of Sores - A Cry of Despair</span><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
<o:AllowPNG/>
</o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
</xml><![endif]--><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-52228912511631838552012-01-02T17:59:00.002+00:002012-01-02T18:12:43.231+00:00Some records I enjoyed in 2011<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
Much like many other people, I'm posting an end of year list on a neglected blog. I've compiled a rough list of what I've been listening to in 2011, in a vague order of preference. It hasn't been easy as I've listened to some things a lot whilst walking about, and other ones I've only played a few times on the record deck. But you get the idea. If I tried to sort out a proper system of picking the best, it would still take me weeks to listen to all of these again. A lot of the lower ones have barely skimmed past my ears. All the links lead to audio or video on other sites so you know what I'm on about.</div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
1. A Winged Victory For The Sullen - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FoqBKYR312A" target="_blank">A Winged Victory For The Sullen</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
2. Necro Deathmort - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fEWQ0KXDVE" target="_blank">Music of Bleak Origin</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
3. Vessels - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjTVVSDNPUk" target="_blank">Helioscope</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
4. Astrohenge - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kszFVQdt64A" target="_blank">II</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
5. Battles - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQYFTSWNx_Q" target="_blank">Gloss Drop</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
6. Lafaro - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb-CyXskfpc" target="_blank">Easy Meat</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
7. That Fucking Tank - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRA5QCC-3lo" target="_blank">TFT</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
8. Cloudkicker - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpjmvYbAvhc" target="_blank">Let Yourself Be Huge </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
9. Reigns - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7NXF6uvvHU" target="_blank">The Widow Blades</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
10. Machinefabriek - <a href="http://machinefabriek.bandcamp.com/track/sol-sketch-20" target="_blank">Sol Sketches</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
11. Down I Go - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ud6qGFH6pjE" target="_blank">Gods </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
12. Three Trapped Tigers - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWOwLKcqb40" target="_blank">Route One Or Die</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
13. Wiht - <a href="http://wihtleeds.bandcamp.com/album/the-harrowing-of-the-north" target="_blank">The Harrowing of The North</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
14. Dark Castle - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lB-_gASCQco" target="_blank">Surrender To All Life Beyond Form</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
15. Alright The Captain - <a href="http://alrightthecaptain.bandcamp.com/track/soundtrack-your-death-2" target="_blank">Snib </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
16. Khuda - <a href="http://khuda.bandcamp.com/track/haikyo" target="_blank">Iecava</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
17. Milieu - <a href="http://milieu.bandcamp.com/track/airjet-yellow" target="_blank">Eufloria</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
18. White Hills - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVcXBPhHSTI" target="_blank">H-p1</a> </div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
19. 65daysofstatic - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOFZZ9y9w_Q" target="_blank">Silent Running</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
20. Amon Tobin - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WKPwaqpo0E" target="_blank">ISAM</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
21. Earth - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lf259keO-mY" target="_blank">Angels of Darkness, Demons of Light I</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
22. Altar of Plagues - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zi6znr0VOGQ" target="_blank">Mammal </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
23. *shels - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0iBcNEhqMU" target="_blank">Plains of the Purple Buffalo</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
24. And So I Watch You From Afar - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUSzK9FznB4" target="_blank">Gangs </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
25. Wolves In The Throne Room - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lmjAgPAc0U" target="_blank">Celestial Lineage</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
26. d_rradio - <a href="http://heatdeathrecords.bandcamp.com/album/forecast" target="_blank">Forecast</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
27. Grouper - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0zOdenFBK4" target="_blank">A I A : Dream Loss </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
28. Devin Townsend Project - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2junZRuEG0" target="_blank">Ghost</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
29. Kid Koala - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08WXwSJunAI" target="_blank">Space Cadet</a> </div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
30. Umber - <a href="http://umber.bandcamp.com/album/mornings-pass-ep" target="_blank">Morning's Pass</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
31. Radius System - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6KoGa4LrAk" target="_blank">Architects of Yesterday</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
32. Primus - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAKZFeX_Sd8" target="_blank">Green Naugahyde </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
33. Spindrift - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDZDsk52jeA" target="_blank">Classic Soundtracks</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
34. The Field - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVNqWZPqxDE" target="_blank">Looping State of Mind</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
35. Dressed In Wires - <a href="http://www.dressedinwires.co.uk/golden.html" target="_blank">Golden The Ship Was - Oh! Oh! Oh!</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
36. Ulver - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEIxieAinKg" target="_blank">Wars of The Roses</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
37. Mogwai - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WN3iuBYzBiY" target="_blank">Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
38. ...And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3Fjno-lei8" target="_blank">Tao of the Dead</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
39. The Pattern Theory - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_kc8_xr070" target="_blank">The Pattern Theory </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
40. Amplifier - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mixPxkJswHA" target="_blank">The Octopus</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
41. Absu - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZDowNse1Fk" target="_blank">Abzu </a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
42. Gnod - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_KynZ_uF4A" target="_blank">Ingnodwetrust</a> </div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
43. Misty's Big Adventure - <a href="http://www.pledgemusic.com/widgets/856" target="_blank">The Family Amusement Centre</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
44. Juffage - <a href="http://juffage.bandcamp.com/track/my-weakness-album-version" target="_blank">Semicircle</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
45. Half Man Half Biscuit - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZiGIKopbDs" target="_blank">90 Bisodol (Crimond)</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
46. This Will Destroy You - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSLRrntu2nk" target="_blank">Tunnel Blanket</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
47. Maybeshewill - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaWYjohc0aw" target="_blank">I Was Here For A Moment, Then I Was Gone</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
48. Warm Digits - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlNk_eKHT8g" target="_blank">Keep Warm... with the Warm Digits</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
49. Trumpets of Death - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5LLfyhr0s8" target="_blank">Teeth + Teeth = Teeths</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
50. William D. Drake - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31coUVhGG9Y" target="_blank">The Rising Of The Lights</a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
Next year I am looking forward to new releases by the likes of Wodensthrone, Dextro, Manatees, Northerner, Neurosis, Latitudes and countless others... </div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-36603285852945992932011-09-18T13:14:00.000+01:002011-09-18T13:14:22.639+01:00The Argos Challenge<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
Here's a fun game for 2 or more players when visiting an Argos store.</div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Without looking at a catalogue, each contestant must randomly enter numbers into the stock checking console until a real item is found. Whoever gets a result first is the winner. This isn't as easy as it sounds. As an optional extra, the winner gets to own whatever item they found at the expense of the other contestants.</span>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-46551160892509141182011-09-18T13:08:00.001+01:002011-09-18T13:08:33.063+01:00The Ikea Challenge<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
Here's a fun game for 2 or more players when visiting an Ikea store.</div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The idea is to collect as many pencils as you can physically hide about your person before you reach the checkouts. Once outside, you each count up your pencils and the one with the most is the winner. As a reward, they get to claim all the pencils from every contestant in the game.</span>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-81428246125830244992011-09-15T21:38:00.001+01:002011-09-15T21:40:12.117+01:00Golden The Ship Was - Oh! Oh! Oh!<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
I haven't posted here in a while. Not because I'm too lazy (well, that was one factor) but because I've been too busy! I'm going to try and post a bit more often to show what I've been doing. Here is one such thing.</div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
This landmark occasion marks my first album cover. Better than that, it's an album cover for a noisemaker who I listen to regularly, and I really enjoy this particular collection of his tunes. The drawing used here started life as a messy red scribble representing some blood to be placed under a hammer-shaped logo for a fictional metal band. However that didn't look very good and I scrapped it, but mucked about with the splatter in some basic photo editing software (I normally just do stuff with pens) until I came up with the black and white outline shape.</div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
Initially, it looked like an awesome beard. I uploaded it to a popular social networking site and <a href="http://dressedinwires.co.uk/">Dressed In Wires</a> himself contacted me to ask if he could use a piece of my artwork for an album cover. I think I suggested the scribble in question as I had no other use for it but I still like it, and it seems to suit his sounds quite well. After I pointed out it's beard-like visage, he sensibly decided to invert it for the album cover. The packaging is hand made by him, with my art on stickers applied to the cardboard case. This is it:</div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgG_VB_Az9Hf6A4olOgRck6pPUwAchdKnPDLIy0XcCmS3XQ9EDKOrC3X3FFEHgzGshph3iaZBucx7dG_Ed5EPrcpdLee7wagfprIo3ntywR2i36vKX0ybNqXSigoNRfJGfTBPfzH32H7Y8/s1600/DIWgolden2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="289" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgG_VB_Az9Hf6A4olOgRck6pPUwAchdKnPDLIy0XcCmS3XQ9EDKOrC3X3FFEHgzGshph3iaZBucx7dG_Ed5EPrcpdLee7wagfprIo3ntywR2i36vKX0ybNqXSigoNRfJGfTBPfzH32H7Y8/s320/DIWgolden2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
</div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">When mucking about with it, I also put two together making a sort of explosion effect. This got used in some teaser trailers for the album which you can see on </span><a href="http://www.dressedinwires.co.uk/golden.html" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">THIS PAGE</a><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"> where you can also order the album. Get a move on though, there's only 25 of them in total!</span><br />
<br />
<br />Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-55439144519670048542011-05-09T19:10:00.000+01:002011-05-09T19:11:12.233+01:00There Was An Old Woman Who Lived In A ShrewWHAT HAVE I DONE?!<br /><br />I seem to have folded into the stereotypical view that a blog is a miserable pile of secrets and taken up poetry.<br /><br />This stems from waking up at 7am one Friday morning with a misquoted children's rhyme in my head, and found it stupendously easy to add new lines to it. It is currently Monday, so this is how far I've got after a weekend of thinking about this madness.<br /><br />Essentially this piece is a combination of "There Was An Old Woman Who Lived In A Shoe" and "There Was An Old Lady Who Swallowed A Fly" ...with a bit of a twist. It's very much a work in progress and potentially could go on for a very long time. Let me know what you reckon!<br /><br />So then, here we go:<br /><br />There was an old woman who lived in a shrew<br />How she got in there, nobody knew<br /><br />The creature was bulbous, his eyes fit to burst<br />His quality of life was really the worst<br /><br />As for the woman, she ran out of space<br />Her objects and trinkets came out of his face<br /><br />At this point she considered buying a house<br />But opted instead to move into a mouse<br /><br />This wasn’t much better and the mouse also died<br />There simply was not enough room inside<br /><br />Down by the river, she entered a vole<br />A little more spacious, but out of control<br /><br />The poor thing went mental and jumped in a lake<br />Hitting the bottom, his legs they did break<br /><br />Still in the water, she discovered a frog<br />And loaded her possessions into his gob<br /><br />She struggled a lot to get everything in<br />Her stuff tore a hole in the animal’s skin<br /><br />Afloat on the surface, she encountered a duck<br />At first this seemed like a stroke of good luck<br /><br />But the duck was soon uncomfortably overloaded<br />When she was done moving in, the poor thing exploded<br /><br /><br />To be continued...Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-85947135006064387572011-03-16T21:12:00.004+00:002011-03-16T21:28:44.237+00:00The Gentleman Ghost<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Recently I was reminded of a small press comic that I have really enjoyed reading several times, entitled The Gentleman Ghost. It is probably my favourite work (so far) of a chap called Jack Fallows, who also runs the small press bit of my local comic shop. His site tells you </span><a style="font-family: trebuchet ms;" href="http://www.jackfallows.com/">all you need to know</a><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Rather than attempt to explain what is so good about the comic, here are some samples taken from his site (click the images to make them bigger):</span><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-family: trebuchet ms;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Exjh7XJXrZo/TYEpgzpgCzI/AAAAAAAAAGw/1WO-keq3_iQ/s1600/gentleman%2Bghost%2B1.png"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 283px; height: 400px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Exjh7XJXrZo/TYEpgzpgCzI/AAAAAAAAAGw/1WO-keq3_iQ/s400/gentleman%2Bghost%2B1.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5584790656512953138" border="0" /></a>I particularly enjoy his blow-dried moustache.<br /></div><br /><a style="font-family: trebuchet ms;" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vqmmbcJGU9U/TYEpXi4r7vI/AAAAAAAAAGo/TeP5BCW5VOI/s1600/gentleman%2Bghost%2B2.png"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 283px; height: 400px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vqmmbcJGU9U/TYEpXi4r7vI/AAAAAAAAAGo/TeP5BCW5VOI/s400/gentleman%2Bghost%2B2.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5584790497394421490" border="0" /></a><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Hopefully this gives you a good idea of what the comic is like, and what sort of stuff Jack does. You can buy his stuff </span><a style="font-family: trebuchet ms;" href="http://www.etsy.com/shop/crumpettimecomics">here</a><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"> at reasonable prices.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">His comic "The Big Bang" is also very good indeed, but the two episodes published so far don't give too much away just yet... I'm sure it will be a masterpiece when it all comes together though!</span>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-36893019224269781592011-01-05T19:50:00.005+00:002011-01-05T20:09:24.975+00:00Green Slime<div><span class="Apple-style-span">Recently, it was the birthday of a horrible man named Philip Heckles. Don't worry if you haven't heard of him, I wish I hadn't. He probably doesn't even have a Wikipedia page... Nah he doesn't, I just checked. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poker_After_Dark">This</a> is the closest result for some reason.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Anyway, I was wondering what to get for him for a short while. He tends to spend money on gifts for others, but I've been a bit skint. So, as usual, it was time for an in-joke present. Easy enough, he's obsessed (and quite rightly so) with this 1968 factual documentary* film theme tune:<br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><object width="480" height="385" style="display: inline-block; background-image: url(http://www.blogger.com/img/video_object.png); background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: black; background-position: 50% 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; "><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vKESo2ofEcw?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">...so I did a quick scribble based on it. It looks like this:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy-_te7WWE6dluMMVEfPbRdh9T7goH1qWiqunaQS4ddPPBd1eaKR2X62VtV-AxZ6ohN8yXZT3mzyZN3m6IdSR7j_wXmbqUNLB6kAxo3VXY7siFmb1CFsaFxlxsKCJ2oYV2DEiIG1gIEW0/s1600/Green+Slime.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 283px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy-_te7WWE6dluMMVEfPbRdh9T7goH1qWiqunaQS4ddPPBd1eaKR2X62VtV-AxZ6ohN8yXZT3mzyZN3m6IdSR7j_wXmbqUNLB6kAxo3VXY7siFmb1CFsaFxlxsKCJ2oYV2DEiIG1gIEW0/s400/Green+Slime.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5558793990513916706" /></a><br />The picture is 2 different green inks applied to a piece of A4 size white card with a wooden kebab skewer and a little plastic spray bottle. You may notice I got the quote wrong. That is because I didn't watch the clip before making this, and I didn't really have a plan when I started. Also, the words I use are our own twisted variation of the lyrics**. I painted a nice wooden frame dark green and varnished it to make it look slimy.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">That was it basically, present sorted. Upon receiving said gift, his reaction was "it's a picture!"</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Well done Phil, your age and intelligence go hand-in-hand.<br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">The Smallprint***:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">*Well, 99% of it based on real life events.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">**A poor excuse.</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">***I can't actually adjust the size of small section of text, just the whole article. But you can pretend.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-71119428356315922242011-01-02T01:58:00.001+00:002011-01-02T01:58:51.320+00:002010 in Music - Releases<div><span class="Apple-style-span" >I haven’t really sat down and thought about a countdown of top albums this year, but I always make a note of what albums I’ve bought throughout the year (that are released during it) then just mark off what ones were really fucking good… then try to arrange them in some sort of rough order. This isn’t exactly fair as some albums get a billion plays since January, others only get 4 or 5 plays, over the last week! I also decided to combine releases for artists who have proper churned stuff out this year.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Regardless, here’s my attempt to organise some records I’ve enjoyed this year:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >1. Astrohenge - Astrohenge</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >2. Teeth Of The Sea - Your Mercury</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >3. The Declining Winter - Scenes From The Back Bedroom Window EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >4. The Green Kingdom - Prismatic / Remixes</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >5. Altar of Plagues - Tides EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >6. Triptykon - Esparistera Daimones</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >7. Khuda - Palingnesia</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >8. Working For A Nuclear Free City - Jojo Burger Tempest</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >9. Cloudkicker - Beacons / ]]][[[ EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >10. d_rradio - Parts / Seasons EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >11. Alcest - Écailles de Lune</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >12. Gold Panda - Lucky Shiner</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >13. Brave Timbers - For Every Day You Lost</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >14. The Moscow Coup Attempt - Transmissions From The End of The World</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >15. Mass - Paint By Numbers</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >16. We Are Knuckle Dragger - Doors To Rooms EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >17. Lafaro - Lafaro</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >18. IO - Materioptikon</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >19. Dead Meadow - Three Kings</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >20. Rose Kemp - Golden Shroud</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >21. Fieldhead - Riser EP / Long Train Journeys / Reference Line</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >22. Black Mountain - Wilderness Heart</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >23. The Dark Sky Singers - Like No English</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >24. Mogwai - Special Moves</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >25. worriedaboutsatan - Heart Monitor EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >26. 65daysofstatic - We Were Exploding Anyway / Heavy Sky EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >27. Wolf People - Steeple / Tidings</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >28. Baths - Cerulean</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >29. Admiral Angry - A Fire To Burn Down This World</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >30. Scott Kelly -The Wake</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >31. Gallops - Gallops EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >32. These Monsters - Call Me Dragon</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >33. Unkle - Where Did The Night Fall</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >34. BXI - BXI EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >35. The Books - The Way Out</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >36. Mender - The Happy Medium / Resonant Tense EP</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >37. Quack Quack - Slow As An Eyeball</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >38. Autechre - Oversteps</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >39. Silent Front - Dead Lake</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >40. Drum Eyes - Gira Gira</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >What have I missed then? I must point out that I didn’t find the time (or money) to buy every album I wanted to, so yes there are big gaps in the shape of God Is An Astronaut, SWANS, Grinderman, Chickenhawk, Humanfly (I only have that album on tape so it’s only had a couple of plays so far), Enslaved, The Phantom Band, Sleepy Sun, Melvins, Zach Hill, Bardo Pond, and so on… I’m still waiting for the postman to deliver the 2010 releases by Talons and Conquering Animal Sound too.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >There’s also a load more that I didn’t mention as the list would end up going on forever. A top 40 is already too much to try to figure out! Feel free to discuss any of the records I have or haven’t included.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >In 2011 I am looking forward to new releases from Vessels, Manatees, Three Trapped Tigers, Mogwai, And So I Watch You From Afar, …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead, Necro Deathmort, The Pattern Theory, Alright The Captain, Dextro… the list goes on!</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-88727447370096835962010-12-31T11:46:00.004+00:002010-12-31T13:37:55.803+00:002010 in Music - Visual<span class="Apple-style-span">Normally, I don't see many music videos. I've never had a TV with music channels (I don't have a TV at all these days), and I tend to listen to music when drawing / painting / reading / sleeping. So a visual element would be wasted on me.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">However, the internet has changed all that. I still haven't really gone out of my way to search for any videos, but a few have made themselves known to me. I'll explain how as I go along, I suppose.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Be warned though, this is a very mixed bag of serious and stupid videos, both of which appeal to me. Trying to organise them into a sort of "top ten" isn't easy... but I'll give it a shot! Well, it became a top twelve during the writing process, but I can pretend it's deliberate... one for each month? Regardless, feast your eyes and ears:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">12. Dressed In Wires - Let The World Be Wary.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I can't put this any higher, cos all the footage is nicked. But it works well with the track, suitably weird and dark. I had to include some DiW somewhere.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/CjugiJes1jo?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/CjugiJes1jo?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">11. Kunt And The Gang - Use My Arsehole As A Cunt (The Nick Clegg Story)</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I forgot to mention this fella in my live round-up, but I spent the whole gig grinning from ear to ear at the crude level of humour. This variation of Use My Arsehole... has a political edge, and got to number 66 in the UK singles chart at Christmas. Bravo Kunt!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/mv1OigmYcvQ?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/mv1OigmYcvQ?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">10. Holy Fuck - Red Lights</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">OK so I've only just seen this, and will probably think it's very silly when I look back on this post, but I did thoroughly enjoy it on the first watch. I haven't even bought this album yet.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DhaRkWfaq10?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DhaRkWfaq10?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">9. Triptykon - Shatter</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">If you ignore all the metal video clichés here, and just enjoy the long shadows and general grimness, I think it's quite good. I may well be biased due to how much I've been enjoying Triptykon this year. I didn't see this video until they were added to the Bloodstock 2011 line-up though. Tom G. Warrior looks a bit like the Emperor off of Star Wars here. Or the Pope.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xrRi25jZRFY?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xrRi25jZRFY?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">8. We Are Knuckle Dragger - Explanations With Connotations</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">This video is all about smug faces. You'll see what I mean. It's also the best use of Penshaw Monument since it's original purpose as an altar of ritualistic goat sacrifice*. I saw this video as I've been keeping an eye on whatever these chaps do, just because I like their noises. I even went to a Halloween music video shoot for their next single Tom Ryder. The resulting film features my housemate Mark dressed as a Thwmop from Mario.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/sQhBio0R1_g?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/sQhBio0R1_g?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">7. Dextro - Momentary</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">A simple idea, well executed. You can see a lot of time has been spent recording a lot of footage, then combined in the most visually appealing way. This was also my favourite track from 2009's Winded (which topped my end of year album list), so it's good to see a suitably hypnotic visual representation of it. There's also an excellent video for Ring Cycle from the same album (and a 12" released this year), but as I mentioned, this track is my favourite.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JTg-ijoEfw8?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JTg-ijoEfw8?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">6. Mountains Became Machines - The Screening</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I've just had to expand my list to make room for this gem I'd almost forgotten about (it seems older than it actually is to me, as I've listened to this single loads)! I like how the presentation of an old documentary or infomercial about television becomes quite sinister and imposing with the musical accompaniment, but still almost triumphant with the addition of vocals near the end of the track. It's a real shame these guys called it quits this year!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/945OGDWNh-c?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/945OGDWNh-c?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">5. The Moscow Coup Attempt - The Travelers</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Another prime example of a great visual representation of a piece of music. However, TMCA deliberately creates work in this manner, having made soundtrack pieces in the past. This album was released as a DVD, a full audio visual experience as opposed to an album with videos added later. But this track stands out to me, both musically and in film format.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Kd5jGcrFqAI?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Kd5jGcrFqAI?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">4. That Fucking Tank - Mr Blood</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I can't post a link to this as the première was only held last night. But it was a really professional and suitably bizarre piece of film. I'll update this when it's been added to Youtube.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">3. Blockhead - The Music Scene</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I can't say I'm a huge fan of Blockhead, and after picking up this album (promo copy, £1) I still only really like this track. Even then, it's probably because of how blown away I was by the video. Superb trippy animation and a great concept for a film piece (I enjoyed the comments by Youtube users, trying to figure out what was going on). It was really tough deciding if this should be higher in the list!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/NhheiPTdZCw?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/NhheiPTdZCw?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">2. Amon Tobin - Esther's</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">This is more like a short film than a music video to me. The level of quality is astounding, and the idea is really cool. Amon Tobin's glitchy music has always featured robotic style album artwork, and it's great to see a full video to go with the theme. This must have taken ages, which you can tell not only by how great the video is, but the fact that this track was originally released in 2007. The video was released as part of the Ninja Tune 20th anniversary celebrations this year, much like the Blockhead one. This one just stole the glory for me as I'm a big Amon Tobin fan, and seeing this inspired me to have a good old back-catalogue binge. I do think the doorbell should ring at the end of the video though.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/CdcZyOY4Z1E?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/CdcZyOY4Z1E?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">1. Grinderman - Heathen Child</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">The daftest, most ridiculous thing I've seen all year. Nick Cave and co. dressed as giant romans, firing lasers out of their eyes.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vKznZUtKntg?fs=1&hl=en_GB"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vKznZUtKntg?fs=1&hl=en_GB" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">So there you have it. Did I miss any other treats this year?</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">*This may not be 100% true.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-40268483543731943312010-12-28T16:15:00.000+00:002010-12-28T16:16:26.647+00:002010 in Music - Live<div><span class="Apple-style-span" >2010 has been a bloody good year for music, as far as I’m concerned. I’ve crossed some big names off my “to see” list, but added just as many to it by exploring new releases. No change there then. Before I attempt to go on about records, some live highlights this year have included:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Roadburn Festival, Tilburg, The Netherlands in April. Holy shit. This was the best collection of bands in one weekend I have ever known. Dream Of An Opium Eater, Goatsnake, Altar of Plagues, Triptykon, Yob, Enslaved, Thorr’s Hammer, Moss, Garcia Plays Kyuss, Nachtmystium, Church of Misery, Jarboe and of course our local doom heroes Bong. So many intense performances in such a short space of time. Incredible. Tickets for Roadburn 2011 have been purchased.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Mono & Glissando, The Brudenell Social Club, Leeds in March. The atmosphere was beyond words here. A sold out gig, remaining in complete silence for the two band performances. Both of which were incredibly stirring and powerful in their delicate sound construction.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Godspeed You! Black Emperor at the Barrowlands, Glasgow in December. My first venture to the Barrowlands, but definitely not my last. Godspeed played for a whopping 2 and a half hours, without any breaks. Background visuals were enthralling but not distracting, the sound was controlled and powerful as required. Purely mind-blowing.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >King Creosote at Henry Boons Yard Bar, Wakefield in April. It’s not often that anyone good comes to my hometown. Henry Boons isn’t really a venue either. So I knew this was going to be something special. I’ve been a fan of KC since I saw him support and out-perform Arab Strap many years ago in Newcastle, and I’ve seen him a couple of times between then and this gig. But this was only my second time seeing him play solo. His skilful acoustic guitar and accordion playing fits perfectly with his beautiful and/or comedic song writing. Another lengthy set with a beer break in the middle, very good value for money. Decent sized crowd, and people knew all the words… unexpected!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Vessels, Quack Quack & Juffage at The Library, Leeds in January. Vessels are one of my favourite bands, and this gig was also my introduction to the incredible Juffage, who I have now seen a load of times and I even had him play a gig in Sunderland. As well as great sets from all the acts playing, there was a four-way drum battle between the two drummers from Quack Quack and the two drummers from Vessels, which was intense and bloody noisy! Also, I got wrecked with Tom Khuda, who can’t handle his booze.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Gold Panda at The Cut, Newcastle in November. You can’t beat going to see a musician and ending up drinking from the rider, having awesome banter with all the bands and just feeling very welcome around the people you’ve paid to go and see. It makes it all worth it.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >That Fucking Tank. Four times in various places. The New Wave Of New Wave Of British Heavy Metal is a new song they’ve been blasting out, and I’m hooked to the point of chasing them down whenever possible. Not that I wasn’t already fanatical about them.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Taint and Manatees at Trillians, Newcastle in August. This almost didn’t happen. I’m so fucking glad I got in touch with the bands to make sure it did do though, and holy shit it was worth it. Manatees always blow my head off, they make exactly the sort of noises I want to hear. Taint played incredibly well too, and it sadly turned out to be their last tour.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Gentlemans Pistols and Trippy Wicked & The Cosmic Children of the Knight at The Borough, Sunderland in October. I helped to get this one sorted, and it was a roaring success. Trippy Wicked were excellent as ever, and I was blown away by Gentlemans Pistols who I hadn’t seen previously.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Scott Kelly at Trillians, Newcastle in December. Powerful vocals and song writing, slow guitar playing, intense silent atmosphere. Perfect.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Alcest at Damnation festival, Leeds in November. You had to be there.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Black Mountain and Wolf People at TJ’s Woodhouse Club, Leeds in September. Heavy psychedelic blues rock masters Black Mountain delivered exactly what I wanted to hear, at a suitably ridiculous volume. Wolf People were a late addition to the bill but were the ideal warm up.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Part Chimp at The British Wildlife Festival, The Brudenell in Leeds. My ears are still bleeding.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Throughout the year I also soaked up a load of performances by Lafaro, We Are Knuckle Dragger, Khuda, Alright The Captain, Future of The Left, Humanfly, These Monsters, Maybeshewill, The Pattern Theory, Dextro, Kong, worriedaboutsatan, and countless others.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >I’ve spent over 90 days or evenings at musical events this year, so I could continue with this for quite a while, but I’ll round it off now. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >It’s also been absolutely incredible to go on tour as a merch monkey for Wodensthrone, and be able to see some amazing performances by Wolves In The Throne Room, A Forest of Stars, The Axis of Perdition, Haar, Cloaca, and of course Wodensthrone themselves. All whilst getting messed up on Dr Thunder and having a bloody good time. …and we met The Hairy Bikers at Watford Gap services.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >I wonder who I’ll see in 2011...</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-36558097953200207212010-11-17T22:14:00.003+00:002010-11-17T22:23:10.354+00:00Wall Painting 2<span class="Apple-style-span">This is a bit of a disappointment...</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">You may remember that I have been working on a wall-sized painting in a bar in Sunderland. <a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/wall-painting.html">Here</a>'s the blog post with all the details.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Well, the bar recently closed, changed hands and is due to re-open at some point I suppose. But I've been informed that my wall (and everyone else's giant artworks) have been painted over. Completely blank white walls again. Hours and hours of work gone. Just like that.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I'm glad I took photos of the process so I still have something to show for it, if only a tiny snapshot into the monumental amount of work involved. I'm also pretty glad I didn't soldier on and finish it in the last couple of months... it would have really annoyed me if I just got it all sorted before it was erased from history.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">In the future, I think I'll stick to canvas so I can at least get my work back if a place closes down. Can't really take a wall home with me... nowhere to put it.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-22803948564551755312010-11-15T20:05:00.002+00:002010-11-15T20:18:55.708+00:00Supermutant Animal Duels 3<span class="Apple-style-span" >Hello Supermutant Animal Duel fans! It's been a while. Your DVD discs of <a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/supermutant-animal-duels.html">season 1</a> and <a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/08/supermutant-animal-duels-2.html">season 2</a> must be getting mighty worn out by now. But fret not, season 3 is finally here! We've assembled the best selection of ludicrous animals... the worst possible film directors... and some especially terrible special effects*.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Supermutant Animal Duel season 3 box set contains the following ten fights:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Morbidly Obese Wasp vs Anorexo Squirrel</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Junkie Mole vs Crack Parrot</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Fluffy Mammoth vs Zombie Lobster</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Venomous Raccoon vs Hermit Pig</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Furious Worm vs Colossal Midge</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Stealth Whale vs Mind Trout</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Broken Swan vs Miserable Budgie</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Atlas Moth vs Sat-Nav Caterpillar</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Paraplegic Kangaroo vs The Tourettes Giraffe</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Shifty Pigeon vs Benevolent Sky Moose</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >*none of this is real. Still, a man can dream.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-31918914954284608982010-09-16T17:37:00.002+01:002010-09-16T18:36:18.968+01:00Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?<span class="Apple-style-span" >Last night, I met a man who claimed to be a millionaire. Bizarrely, this is the second time this has happened, and both situations were incredibly random. Which is why I think these stories need to be told...</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Millionaire number one was a very strange Irish man who I encountered in Sunderland one night when out drinking with a few friends. My initial introduction to him was when I heard him laughing just after a girl had fallen down a full flight of particularly painful looking stairs in a bar. Everyone immediately kicked off about the fact that he was laughing, so he looked for a quick escape route. Being the nearest person to him at the time, he began to talk to me. I then tried to get rid of him by returning to my other friends, but he just wouldn't take "go away" for an answer and decided to tag along. He then paid himself and 3 of us into the next bar / club / thing. It was at some point in the queue that he mentioned being a millionaire, and wanting to spend his money with some good friends. How he got his riches remains a mystery... if he was even as rich as he claimed to be. How he has no friends better than us was easy to find out.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Inside the bar he showed very little social skills, grabbing a barmaid by the arm to get her attention, shouting "Oi!" at a barman to get his attention, and slapping various blokes on the arse for no reason whatsoever. He was a terrifying man to be around, but we thought he would eventually get a round in with the wads of cash he was waving around. He didn't. He did, however, invite us to his private box at the Sunderland stadium for a football match the next day. We politely declined as he was a complete mentalist. After a short while, he said or did something stupid to a bunch of guys nearby, and then told us to leave as he was about to get into a fight. We haven't seen him since, thankfully.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Millionaire number two was essentially just a horrendously drunken Asian man with lots of money about his person. He stumbled into The Brudenell in Leeds with a pint in his hands, even though the bar was already closed. He started dancing to The Pattern Theory who were playing the encore of their headline set. Then he started shouting and trying to get me and Jeff of Juffage fame to dance with him. We politely declined but he began to be a nuisance. So, the promoter asked him to leave. When he refused to do so, his pint was confiscated and taken outside, but he then paid the full entry price to come back in for the last 1-2 minutes of the last song of the night.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >During this mess, he had been waving his money around, and he did have quite a lot of cash on him. I hope for his sake that he didn't get mugged on the way home, as he wouldn't have a clue what happened the next day. After the gig had ended, he continued to be annoying in front of the merch stand, potentially explaining the lack of sales after the bands had finished. Then he got into a fight with some bloke who was trying to get him to spend all of his riches on our merchandise, which sadly didn't work.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >The real highlight of his presence was when he finally decided to go home. It took him about four attempts to get his leather jacket on (more specifically, to get his arms in the correct sleeves), and then proceeded to do the whole "OK, I'm going now, bye!" thing several times before actually going, even though no one was paying him much attention.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >I wonder if either of these two chaps were actually loaded... or just mental...?</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-87998187887594612762010-09-11T20:58:00.005+01:002010-09-11T21:26:18.863+01:00The Poster Theory<div><div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >As you may have noticed, I haven't posted anything here for a while. This is because I've been really busy for a change. One of the many things occupying my time of late has been the organisation of a gig for </span><a href="http://www.myspace.com/thepatterntheory"><span class="Apple-style-span" >The Pattern Theory</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" >, and the designing of the </span><a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/08/gig-poster-pattern-theory.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" >posters</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" > for the event.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >As I type this, the gig is now just a week away and everything seems to be coming together at last. The gig posters were placed in various record shops and bars in Sunderland and Newcastle, including within the venue itself. However, someone decided to specifically tear down and screw up all of the posters in the venue and the bar opposite for some reason. Thankfully, I also got a load of flyers done so hopefully people will still hear about it.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >The venue itself also printed out a couple of the same posters, but at A1 and A0(!) size. The A1 version can be seen on the outside of the venue:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TIvhAmYd97I/AAAAAAAAAFg/S-yk3X1p3rg/s1600/P1070094.JPG"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TIvhAmYd97I/AAAAAAAAAFg/S-yk3X1p3rg/s400/P1070094.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5515749569064728498" style="display: block; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: auto; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: auto; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px; " /></a><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Here it is again, with a bit of zoom action:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TIvhqAFc6HI/AAAAAAAAAFo/894brc7AixU/s1600/P1070095.JPG"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TIvhqAFc6HI/AAAAAAAAAFo/894brc7AixU/s400/P1070095.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5515750280338925682" style="display: block; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: auto; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: auto; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px; " /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >The A0 size one is supposedly inside the venue at the top of the stairs, but I haven't been in the main room since it was put up... just the little room for a gig or two. I've already been told I can have the massive one after the gig though, which is a pretty cool souvenir as far as I'm concerned! I think I'll attempt to get everyone who's playing to sign it too.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >I've also designed some similar posters to sell on the night in question (and at the band's earlier Leeds date). These are A3 colour prints, with four different designs available. All the patterns are taken from my first set of </span><a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/pattern-theory.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" >triangle rubber stamp experiments</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" >. I got 30 of each design printed, making 120 in total. This is what they look like on my wall:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TIvjJWV5foI/AAAAAAAAAFw/kzwckTs9uCI/s1600/P1070093a.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TIvjJWV5foI/AAAAAAAAAFw/kzwckTs9uCI/s400/P1070093a.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5515751918401060482" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span><div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >They seem to blend in with my boring wallpaper rather a lot. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >You may notice that the top left design is slightly paler than the other three. This wasn't deliberate. The first of the four designs, as used on all the flyers and posters, was stamped directly onto some fancy card, then scanned. I did this specifically rather than stamping on white and copying it over, so as to get a more warm and natural appearance to the picture. However, the other 3 designs were stamped on white as I don't have any more fancy card like that. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >The background for those posters is a scan of the back of the same piece of card that I used for the first one, but for some strange reason it came out slightly darker. The stamped designs were also tampered with in terms of colour saturation, so as to mimic the first design instead of appearing in their original stark grey colour scheme.</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Anyway, I'm still pretty pleased with the four designs and after asking a few people which design they prefer, each one has had a few votes. This is helpful as I was worried about selling out of one design quickly and still having 30 left of another</span>.</div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-79175295251306539462010-08-26T13:55:00.002+01:002010-08-26T14:54:04.786+01:00Supermutant Animal Duels 2<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Oh dear, it's that time again. More ridiculous animal fights. Part one is </span><a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/supermutant-animal-duels.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">here</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"> if you don't know what I'm going on about...</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">So, the films in the season 2 box set are:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Annihilation Prawn vs Surveillance Duck</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Electro Possum vs Necro Stoat</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Ghost Owl vs The Infinite Shark</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Astrosnail vs Time Vole</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Frozen Chicken vs Hungry Mule</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Punchy Octopus vs Soggy Lion (From The Rainforest Of Lions)</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Happy Puppy vs Speedgoat</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Murderous Eel vs Agoraphobic Sparrow</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Sadomasochistic Kitten vs Vampire Platypus</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Kamikaze Maggot vs The Incredible Whelk </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">So there you have it. It's been suggested that I attempt to sketch all of these creatures... maybe someday if I find the time I'll have a go at a couple of them.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Thanks for all the suggestions and contributions to this particularly socially relevant topic of discussion. Season 3 is coming soon...</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-83771126040991578832010-08-09T20:35:00.005+01:002010-08-09T21:32:31.291+01:00Recipe: The Colonel<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">To follow up from the last recipe, here's another drink for your banquet.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">For this concoction, I'm going to show you the sketch before telling you about it. See if you can guess what it contains just from the diagram.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGCkes-YBPGlUevoyAT8GDYgJ8x-SG6mPjaN8LCHdhRUDt56PB1nucwiPn3lKBzff8W4DpA2yHEeQLnA4I4IRG_ZXjmBFvMUvsp4rJ4P-F1rXEK36x0ZiWmobwUZvizRclRbhO1zrDvOo/s1600/The+Colonel.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 258px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGCkes-YBPGlUevoyAT8GDYgJ8x-SG6mPjaN8LCHdhRUDt56PB1nucwiPn3lKBzff8W4DpA2yHEeQLnA4I4IRG_ZXjmBFvMUvsp4rJ4P-F1rXEK36x0ZiWmobwUZvizRclRbhO1zrDvOo/s400/The+Colonel.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5503503295847659506" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Right. Yes, it looks like a power station cooling tower. That is because the drinking vessel of choice for this one is a vase. Preferably pale blue, with a frilly top bit and cut glass squares all over the outside.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Why? I have no idea. Before we go any further, I'd like to point out that this drink was invented by a man called Darren, who lives in Blackpool. He is a most peculiar fellow... if only for making this abomination. I had no part in the making of this... thing. It was all his own work, although he had been awake for at least 24 hours and drinking heavily throughout.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">As you can see, this sketch is a lot darker than any of the other things I've drawn. Darker in colour, and in atmosphere. This thing could summon many a demon. The dark liquid in the vase is primarily based around vodka and coke, normal enough...</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">BUT THEN!!! The chunky bits you can sort of see at the bottom (which actually looked that ominous in the flesh) are actually... flesh. Chicken flesh. And bones. This is because the drink was devised after a KFC bucket or two had been devoured by a hungry family.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">So, you've got KFC chicken leftovers, vodka and coke in a glass. Anything else? Sure... might as well throw in the leftover gravy dip too!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I can't describe the flavour as I wisely decided not to partake in it. After being out drinking the night before, waking up and being pestered by children and an angry hangover... I just didn't fancy it. However, it smelled very strongly of all the key ingredients.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Naming it The Colonel is a stroke of genius though. Bravo Darren!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">And now, some sad news:<br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">This is the last of these recipes for now, as I've run out of disgusting food-based experiences. No doubt there will be more though. If anyone actually ever makes all the things I've mentioned, then you deserve a medal for bravery... and a bucket for vomit.</span></div></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-45869702788517239052010-08-07T03:16:00.004+01:002010-08-07T03:29:30.383+01:00Recipe: Thunderhonkey<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">A delicious alcoholic shot.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">There's not much to this one, it's all the rage at parties and I bet after reading this you'll give it a go yourself...</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Thunderhonkey. I know the name sounds a bit racially dubious, but it actually stems from my housemate Jamil mishearing the word "spider". I don't exactly understand how that works, but then... he is a little bit mental.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The premise behind this one is to get drunk whilst enjoying a flavour sensation. Or, it was just what was to hand at the time. I think someone had left half a bottle of sambuca after a party (lets face it, no-one intentionally BUYS that stuff) and we were sat at the kitchen table with some shot glasses. On the table there was the key ingredient... a jar of jalapeño pepper slices.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Naturally, a slice was added to each shot. The two contrasting flavours kind of work together, as they each make the other seem "not as bad".</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">A variant using a red chilli slice was later invented, known as a Bleeding Thunderhonkey. The effect is much the same. You can decide for yourself which one this is, since it's not in colour:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TFzEGrJUvrI/AAAAAAAAAFI/K0Sh-VdfIyw/s1600/Thunderhonkey.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 296px; height: 400px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TFzEGrJUvrI/AAAAAAAAAFI/K0Sh-VdfIyw/s400/Thunderhonkey.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502488463679995570" /></a><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Oh, it needs to be chewed too. You wouldn't want to get a jalapeño stuck in your throat, gently sizzling away... requiring to be washed down with more sambuca.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-46994973294826493102010-08-06T21:42:00.004+01:002010-08-06T22:41:43.026+01:00Gig Poster: Maybeshewill<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Here's the second of the two posters I've been working on recently, for a gig I'm co-promoting with the chaps at <a href="http://www.myspace.com/blankpromotions">Blank Promotions</a>.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">It's for a band called <a href="http://www.myspace.com/maybeshewont">Maybeshewill</a>, who I have seen more times than it is possible to shake a stick at. They generously donated a track to my very own <a href="http://www.myspace.com/notes_magazine">Notes</a> magazine issue 2 ages ago, which people seemed to enjoy listening to rather a lot!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The poster design is pretty simple, the background was just a piece of white card that I covered in various blue pens, inks, paints, pencils and plenty of water to make it all bleed into one mass of colour. Using various different substances for this is interesting as you can't always predict which pens will bleed, despite what the labels say!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The typeface was sketched up in the style of my <a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/search/label/Recipe">recipes</a> on this blog, because I've been enjoying doing that sort of stuff recently. I can do it lazily in bed at the end of the day, then wake up to find my work is already done.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Each letter was drawn twice, one fat and one thin. Or whatever the politically correct term is. Wide and narrow? Chubby and stringy? I dunno. All the letters were roughly drawn outlines to begin with, which I then re-drew over the top once more to improve (or worsen) the overall shape of the letter.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">To decide if I should use a fat or thin letter in sequence, I flipped a coin. An old five pence (the size of a current ten pence) with a bit of masking tape on either side with an "</span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">F</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">" or a "T" on it. I made the F bold there, did you notice? Anyway, this was a very time consuming affair and not something I would recommend. I mean I had fun... but it was pretty boring cutting out all the letters twice with my dodgy photo editing software thing. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">There was a bit of cheating when ordering some of the letters, like if there was two of the same letter in a word I made sure to have one of each type... and I gave MSW a fat M before I started flipping the coin. I quite like the end product though, so it's not all bad.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I also drew the Maybeshewill butterfly <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ0FdZh2SEi0QumksfG8_CsdDJL5nyL_Em9TBZNUlc_gO2_h8_HL8URdSl_RBWN-y8PKzcRrGqOXNfhp37-gnSBXEZol5d4fjNtOf1kMhdYVzuz-DpAJzayuX7wEV8JFjUljXob_SWSEHR/s400/maybeshewill.jpg">logo</a> in the same style as the letters, just a rough outline drawn twice, and slapped it in the dead centre of the poster. I originally drew the butterfly from triangles which I've also been using quite a lot... but it didn't fit in with the rest of the picture so I scrapped it.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Anyway, here is the final thing:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKzkVkFz3JTWvm5Z0hiWWzdYzNYNePzC635leWNIV1V5FgP41qPBunX7JOBWCbuBjasFGQ_OJeryKtbKVgJGZejOidHlWepia5gZGUs6lvjWoaYRuQwlKmJbRgTSSzRQHaF_OTIc4Xb9o/s1600/MSWposterTest5.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 283px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKzkVkFz3JTWvm5Z0hiWWzdYzNYNePzC635leWNIV1V5FgP41qPBunX7JOBWCbuBjasFGQ_OJeryKtbKVgJGZejOidHlWepia5gZGUs6lvjWoaYRuQwlKmJbRgTSSzRQHaF_OTIc4Xb9o/s400/MSWposterTest5.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5502403664700819458" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Also playing are &U&I, my old pals <a href="http://www.myspace.com/ryogapower">Ryoga</a> and one-man wonder <a href="http://www.myspace.com/dextrotransmission">Dextro</a>.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br />What do you reckon? I think the butterfly logo was a bit of an obvious choice, but if you recognise it already then you know what the gig is about before you even read it... which I suppose is a good thing! I tried to do it in my own style at least, and I think it worked in the end.<br /></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Again, I'll be printing some of these up to sell, but just the background and butterfly with the words "Maybeshewill" (in big letters) and "Notes Magazine" (hidden in a corner) on them.</span></div></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-16266757574774604452010-08-05T00:40:00.007+01:002010-08-06T22:24:27.660+01:00Gig Poster: The Pattern Theory<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I've not posted anything in a while, because I've been very busy working on two gig posters for events that I'm organising. They're done now, so I may as well post them.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Here's the one for </span><a href="http://www.myspace.com/thepatterntheory"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The Pattern Theory</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">, which I posted a </span><a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/pattern-theory.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">previous entry</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"> about when I was working on it. The background is a piece of card, and the pattern is ACTUALLY rubber stamped by hand on to it. The main typeface was all hand drawn and scanned in, then used where needed. I did a whole alphabet and numbers, in case I decide to re-use it for a later project. The smaller words were written down as required, scanned and placed on the final design.</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh6vn7OrQPEKDIUgTebrGkCZsnxelnsBaB-fgjdYxMjtojp73Uay1sKQZ1Hvx_OFa0g_R-q7G8Mcldxs6T6gFdr2WrB4dWW8TKOGxMeXNkmxW95qKYb1LMQb9F6hWp7tm5lFiOpMkBYaM/s1600/TPT+poster+test4.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 283px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh6vn7OrQPEKDIUgTebrGkCZsnxelnsBaB-fgjdYxMjtojp73Uay1sKQZ1Hvx_OFa0g_R-q7G8Mcldxs6T6gFdr2WrB4dWW8TKOGxMeXNkmxW95qKYb1LMQb9F6hWp7tm5lFiOpMkBYaM/s400/TPT+poster+test4.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5501704495179778338" /></a><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Also playing this gig are two excellent one-man band projects: </span><a href="http://www.myspace.com/juffage"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Juffage</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"> and </span><a href="http://www.myspace.com/dextrotransmission"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Dextro</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I'm thinking about printing some fancy posters with some of the other patterns on them, so you can choose which one you like. What do you think to that idea? It will probably cost me more, but I like a bit of variety.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-6577970746351875222010-07-27T21:08:00.005+01:002010-07-27T21:22:35.387+01:00Recipe: Noodle Pizza<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Why stop at one student snack when you can have two... at the same time!</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Missed a meal and need to catch up on stodge?</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Can't decide between noodles or pizza?</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Have BOTH my friend!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Noodle Pizza is something I have encountered twice so far. Once, I made it. I was living on whatever Aldi would sell me for dirt cheap... so pasta, noodles, and pizza as an occasional treat. It was fun being a student. I can't exactly remember WHY I made a noodle pizza of all things, but it must have seemed like a good idea at the time.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I believe I cooked the noodles separately, then added them to the already cooked pizza. I then added a bit of cheese and stuck it in the oven for an extra minute or two for optimum meltage. The resulting meal was actually pretty good. I will have used spicy noodles without a doubt, and probably a spicy pizza too. For once, I have just posted an actually edible foodstuff.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The other time I encountered it was as a Halloween party snack, made by someone else. They had taken it a step further and added green food dye to the noodles whilst cooking them. This was a bit too much for me, plus it was cold by the time I found it. I politely declined, as did almost everyone else at the party in question.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">You really don't need a sketch of this one, but I did one anyway in case you've never seen a pizza before. It's very rough as I don't exactly expect many people to actually look at this blog. If anyone asks, the noodles are burnt.</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TE8_XC4L0bI/AAAAAAAAAEw/4B37xX2d7CY/s1600/Noodle+Pizza.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 177px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TE8_XC4L0bI/AAAAAAAAAEw/4B37xX2d7CY/s400/Noodle+Pizza.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5498683335184732594" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br />They look more like scribbly pubic hair here though. I wouldn't suggest putting that on a pizza.</span><br /><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-29192665293742680832010-07-26T14:53:00.003+01:002010-07-26T15:05:27.198+01:00Supermutant Animal Duels<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">This mentalism starts from seeing the films </span><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1350498/"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Megashark vs Giant Octopus</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"> and </span><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0455583/"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Komodo vs King Cobra</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"> which are both terrible. After seeing the second of these abominations, we decided to make up our own ridiculous animal fights.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">There have been too many to remember, at various intervals as this is a recurring conversation. I for one think there is still a great deal of scope for this particular topic.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">However, when the conversation was in full swing last night, I decided to write a few classics down. They're pretty interchangeable... I was just saving two animals per duel in the order they were devised. Feel free to suggest your own. So without further ado, here's the Supermutant Animal Duels DVD box set film listings:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Pandaman vs Lazer Fox</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Awesomehorse vs Thunderbug</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Death Otter vs Stabby Frog</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Battlepig vs Turboslug</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Nuclear Mollusc vs The Phantom Microbe</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Napalm Sloth vs Waterhawk</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Solid Hamster vs Rage Turkey</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Slippery Badger vs Massive Shrew</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Vertical Panther vs Stupid Elephant</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Solar Bear vs Spring Limpet</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Season 2 will probably crop up at some point.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-54406686575977440522010-07-25T14:23:00.003+01:002010-07-25T14:34:43.474+01:00Recipe: Jam Limpets<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">As promised in the </span><a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/recipe-jam-crustacean.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">last recipe post</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">, here's another little piece of cooking gone wrong courtesy of Graeme.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">In an attempt to make some jam tarts, he in-deliberately invented another jam-based sea creature. The shape of the tart casings somehow came out... well... limpet-shaped. As if that wasn't enough, the jam within them was some kind of bizarre mixed jam, which was stickier than even the best superglues. It did such a good job of sticking to the roof of my mouth, my teeth, and my internal organs... that I can easily imagine these blighters in a sheltered rock pool, or stuck to the hull of a ship. These things have the potential to sink many a vessel with their stodge-based crust and ability to grip onto anything, probably even whilst underwater.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Anyway, as usual, I did a little sketch:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TEw9Ajp_WKI/AAAAAAAAAEo/Sj2VkJKJmEA/s1600/Jam+Limpet.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 306px; height: 400px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TEw9Ajp_WKI/AAAAAAAAAEo/Sj2VkJKJmEA/s400/Jam+Limpet.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497836324893186210" /></a><div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#0000EE;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></u></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TEw9Ajp_WKI/AAAAAAAAAEo/Sj2VkJKJmEA/s1600/Jam+Limpet.jpg"></a></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I for one can't wait to see his Jam Sea Anemone.</span></div></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-50262512684987677722010-07-23T22:40:00.004+01:002010-07-23T22:56:04.939+01:00Recipe: Jam Crustacean<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Not so much a recipe as a picture of wrongdom. Back in my old house, a frequent visitor called Graeme would occasionally turn up with baked goods. He still does this in the new house, as the recipe after this one will illustrate.</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">He seems to like making cakes, buns, cookies, biscuits, tarts... but with his own unique twist. Doing something wrong. Not a specific thing, but something. Well, the </span><a href="http://crabbedintosunlight.blogspot.com/2010/07/recipe-wine-pie.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Wine Pie</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"> which he was involved with was a specific bit of wrong... wine and pies do not mix.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The Jam Crustacean is a sort of cake. A cake that didn't rise, and became a funny shape whilst being cooked. The surface of the cake was also hard and quite shiny. Basically, it should have looked like a cake, but actually looked like a crab. I'm not just saying that because I'm a crab enthusiast either, this happened a fair while before I'd even read a Guy N. Smith book!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">Here's a little sketch of it:</span></div></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TEoOQb4_DKI/AAAAAAAAAEg/_FF1KBAqLQY/s1600/Jam+Crustacean.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 219px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_P_Z8SApumFA/TEoOQb4_DKI/AAAAAAAAAEg/_FF1KBAqLQY/s400/Jam+Crustacean.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5497221970686577826" /></a><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">As you can see, I took the liberty of adding some legs, pincers and eyes.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">The line across the middle is where it was sliced open and filled with jam. You can't have a Jam Crustacean without jam.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'trebuchet ms';">I have no idea how you would achieve the construction of one of these things, and I doubt that Graeme does either. I think he just makes these things by accident, possibly when trying to turn lead into gold.</span></div>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-494022169732215919.post-6856647754582888882010-07-20T15:17:00.002+01:002010-07-20T15:27:25.111+01:00Satan's Crustaceans<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I really want to form a band called Satan's Crustaceans despite being in no way musical.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I did a bit of research to see if there were already any bands under that name, and found </span><a style="font-family: trebuchet ms;" href="http://patriotboy.blogspot.com/2009/09/satans-crustaceans.html">this</a> incredible article.<span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Seems like a good blog to follow...</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I also conducted a bit of a search on Myspace, and found this selection of hilarious crustacean based bands:</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Ben Cheddar And The Potato Crustaceans</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">New Age Crustaceans</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Midlife Crustaceans</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Crustacean Armor</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">The Friendly Crustaceans</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Killasauras The Crustacean</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Crustacean Village</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">The Hot Crustacean Band</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Harmonicus The Crustacean</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Auto Erotic Crustacean</span><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">101 Crustaceans</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Which is your favourite?</span><br /><br /><span style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I think Satan's Crustaceans is free for me to use! Now to draw an awesome logo... and do nothing with it.</span>Dr Jonas Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16467470663044802053noreply@blogger.com0